Sunday, November 15, 2009

Rampant Blessings

When I was a child, I could not sit still.

I would often just walk aimlessly in circles while imagining or talking to myself...for hours. There was a table that I would walk around, and I would drag my finger along the edge as I walked. I walked around that table so much, I left a ring. I had worn a trail in the carpet and taken the finish off the hardwood floor.

My mom would shout, “Sit down boy, what is wrong with you…ya got worms in ya?”

I am so thankful for the tranquility of my own children. I can’t begin to think what I would have done in my mother’s shoes.

Wait...what was that?




Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Tiger Woods 2010

I recently got Tiger Woods 2010 for my PS2 (spare me your tired PS3/XBox rhetoric). It's the best golf I will ever play.

With TW10, I don't need Tiger to shoot 3 over par to beat him in the PGA Championship (you broke my heart, Tiger); my skills are so developed, I can whoop him on his best day. Even still, if he happens to start getting the better of me....BAM.....two...words:

reset button

THE POWER OF VIDEO GAMES!

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Seriously, the game mostly rocks. I say mostly because my 6 and 8 year old daughters can beat me at it, despite the hours I've invested while they waste time playing in the yard and such. Also, there's no Q school or Nationwide Tour, etc, and worst of all, there are no World Golf Rankings. HELLO!?

Strangely, there are also no visible fans or gallery, and no groups/pairings. The Sunday pairings are the best, and what fun is missing the fairway if the ball's not going to bean some unsuspecting fan. EA Sports fell far short on this occasion; there's a lot that just isn't in the game.

Saturday, May 2, 2009

Building Home

It is so much fun being a home owner.

We looked for a house for almost 10 years; and now we are building a fence, installing gutters, and constructing a play set for our children in our very own backyard.

And I don’t want to hear another word about Americans not spending money. I have never spent so much money in my entire life: toilets, paint, light bulbs, diapers, nails, screws, lumber, tools, sod, printer cartridges, groceries, fish food, appliances, brakes, VeggieTales, and anything else you can think of…

WE BOUGHT AT LEAST TWO OF ‘EM!

We’re putting so much money into this economy, Obama actually called us when he got off the phone with the Chinese.

We’re spending so much money, the other day at Home Depot, when the clerk gave us the total, the register read out and receipt both read simply “mad cash.”

We have our own line on the US budget recently passed by Congress.

We’re actually printing our own currency. Not only is it recognized by the US government, but it’s valued higher than the dollar.

Our contracting alone accounts for 5% of state employment.

In the true spirit of Obama-nomics, we have even offered a grant to conduct squirrel research to determine how to keep those less-and-less-cute-everyday rodents from eating everything we plant….and how we might use them to produce green energy…and what type of ranged weapon will best get their attention and send a very clear signal about the boundaries of our property (though you can imagine, the lefties…and my daughters…ain’t too happy ‘bout that last one).

Seriously, we are very thankful for all God has provided and we rejoice in having a yard for the squirrels to invade. It is a lot of fun to watch our little “squirrels” chasing the neighborhood squirrels.